Drunken Debate Between Two Men Accomplishes Absolutely Nothing

TEMPE, AZ---After a night of heavy drinking, two men in their early twenties had a discussion that made absolutely no sense on Saturday.

"Dude, seriously," one man argued over and over again.

"Did you fart?" the other pried.

Both men made ridiculous hand gestures and slurred their speech to a nearly incoherent level, according to their friend and designated driver. "The conversation went on for three fucking hours," he griped. "They wouldn't shut up."

Both men repeatedly acknowledged how drunk they were but also how they were pretty much sober.

"Dude, we should order food," one man remarked at the height of the debate.

The dialogue perhaps took its most logical turn when one man asked, "What are we talking about?" and the other responded, "I don't know, I need to go to bed."

"I was already pissed because I had to DD that night," said the sober friend. "Their idiotic conversation made me want to leave without them."

However, after the men repeatedly hugged him and asserted, "dude, you're awesome, no seriously you're a really good person, I love you man," the friend begrudgingly drove the inebriated pair home during which he endured numerous pleas to stop for more fast food.

"Next time I have to be DD, I'm drinking," remarked the friend.